too many sharks(not enough blood in the waves)
by catsandanimenerd
Summary: You're second hand smoke, second hand smoke. I breathe you in, but, honey, I don't know what you're doing to me, mon chéri, but the truth catches up with us eventually


_Coming in unannounced, drag my nails on the tile  
I just followed your scent, you can just follow my smile_

* * *

Shouto is tired, and he is drowning, and he is so, so, so full of things he doesn't understand, so many feelings brought about by one beautiful boy. His thoughts and dreams are haunted by him, always circling around one Midoriya Izuku. It's some kind of curse, he thinks with his head in the clouds, some kind of awful, terrible, _wonderful_ curse.

(Shouto doesn't get much sleep. He's always thinking, always wondering. Why, why, _why_ does Izuku care so much? Why does Shouto want to touch him, why is Izuku so infuriatingly intoxicating? He doesn't know. He doesn't get much sleep, after all.)

He stares at the back of Izuku's head whenever he can, counting each curly strand, each visible freckle, drinking in the sight of his tanned skin and the constellations on his face. He likes listening to Izuku's voice, soothing enough that his shoulders relax and his mind fogs a bit at the edges. He likes the tone of it when he's talking about pro heroes, likes it when it goes low enough that he has to strain to listen. Shouto feels warm when Izuku talks to him in that lovely voice, and he absolutely flies when those moss green eyes land on him.

(Shouto doesn't think it's weird to admire his classmate. But the admiration he feels for Izuku is different to what he feels for All Might. Then again, All Might is his idol, and Izuku is….the boy who hit him with everything, who showed Shouto that he is _not_ his father.)

(Ever since the sports festival, Shouto….doesn't find himself swirling into a breakdown every five minutes, doesn't occupy harmful thoughts about himself. He looks into the mirror and sees a tired, but very….intelligent and _likable_ person, if only for a while. He's not….he's not especially fond of his reflection, not _really_ , but now he's starting to, _maybe_ , like it. Just a tiny bit.)

(He doesn't recoil anymore when he looks in the mirror.)

* * *

 _I'm gonna get you to burst just like you were a bubble, frame me up on your wall just to keep me out of trouble._

 _Like a moth getting trapped in the light by fixation, truly free, love it baby, I'm talking no inflation_

* * *

"You're staring at Midoriya- _chan_ ," Asui Tsuyu, of all people, says to him at lunch break on a rainy, gloomy Friday afternoon. Shouto blinks at her, eyes the frog girl with a calculating look, and pulls her aside. She doesn't _seem_ to mind but Shouto really can't tell. Tsuyu is the one of the only people to truly unnerve Shouto but he doesn't necessarily think ill of her. Her calm demeanor is soothing, especially now when he thinks he's in the middle of a self-induced panic attack.

"You can't tell Midoriya," he blurts the second they're sequestered away into a little nook, anxiety filling his voice and his heart. Tsuyu blinks at him in understanding, that calm, unwavering gaze trained fully on him. Shouto shifts awkwardly.

"I wouldn't do that, Todoroki-chan," she soothes, placing her hand on his arm. "Calm down. There we go, deep breaths." Shouto follows her instructions, unaware of his rapid breathing until she points it out. Slowly, he calms.

"Aah, thank you Asui-san," he says after a moment, his pulse slow and his breathing even. Tsuyu blinks at him, fingers running up and down his arm in a circular motion. She pulls away from him as he calms, keeping her large eyes focused on his chest.

"Call me Tsuyu. And no problem. But if I may so bold, Todoroki- _chan_ , it seems that you have some unresolved feelings about Midoriya- _chan._ It might be better for your health if you expressed them more openly _,_ " she says bluntly, getting to the heart of the problem like cutting through cheese. Shouto supposes that that's another quality about Tsuyu that he likes. She doesn't mince words and sees through to the heart of a situation or problem.

Shouto simply nods at her words though, throat closing as they circle his head. Embarrassment floods his body. Is he just that obvious? Or is Tsuyu much more observant than he's noticed? Tsuyu turns while he's engrossed in anxious thoughts, her attention drifting to something else.

"Oh, Midoriya-chan, hello," Tsuyu says, and Shouto freezes.

(Quite literally-his fingers go numb as ice encases them. His hated left side grabs the slick digits behind his back and warms them up too fast and now his hand aches.)

(But not as much as his heart.)

"A-Ah h-h-hi Tsuyu- _san_! To-todoroki- _kun_!" Izuku greets, his voice fluctuating wildly. Shouto's heartbeat picks up in his chest at the sound. Tsuyu glances at his face, lets out a snort, then smoothly glides away from the two of them with a wave and a wink. Izuku blinks at the sudden departure, a stupefied look on his face that steals Shouto's breath from his body. His eyes trace the freckles dotting Izuku's nose almost mechanically, spelling out constellations and stardust in this cute boy's face. He's mesmerized, completely taken with _Izuku_ and his _face_ and his _voice_ and dear lord, _everything_ that make Izuku who he is.

"Todoroki- _kun_? Is every-everything ok?" Izuku asks shyly, Adam's apple bobbing as he gulps. Shouto hums and leans forward automatically, his fingers tangling in a stray lock of Izuku's that's escaped his mess of a hairdo. Izuku's hair is as soft as a kitten's fur, even softer than it looks. Shouto exhales sharply and ice crystals form, falling softly to the floor like snowflakes. He tucks the lock behind Izuku's ear, hand catching on the warm, red skin on the outer shell.

"Aa," Shouto hums, slowly coming back to himself. His stomach clenches and horror crashes over his brain as his actions catch up with him.

" _Todoroki-kun!_ Your arm is on fire!" Izuku screeches in alarm, mouth open wide in shock at the blaze burning through Shouto's clothes. Shouto yelps in surprise and tries to suck in the flames, to no avail.

Ever the quick thinkers, both boys come to the same conclusion. Their eyes meet, determination shining through as it tends to in these situations. They move together, Izuku throwing himself towards the nearby fire extinguisher while Shouto turns his body towards the fire suppressant. Izuku pulls the red can out in one swift motion and pulls the tab, aiming expertly at the climbing fire engulfing Shouto's arm. Shouto holds his breath and turns his face away as the cool foam douses the fire. Once Izuku finishes, there's a moment of silence. Shouto's face rapidly grows red as the situation hits him, and he's in very serious danger of re-combusting.

"Thanks, Midoriya," he throws at Izuku, whose breathing is heavy and labored by the adrenaline coursing through his veins. His cheeks turn red at the appreciation, mouth flailing uselessly.

"You're welcome," he murmurs warmly, sending another spike of heat through Shouto. Shouto jerks back suddenly, his gaze trailing towards his arm. It's probably _not_ wise to let the substance on his arm sit any longer. His eyes find Izuku's again and his mouth twists into what feels like a grimace.

"I'm going to go wash up," he says through a mouth full of cotton. Izuku gives him a shy smile that goes straight to the turmoil in his stomach. He gives a curt nod, the grimace on his face easing into _something_ resembling a smile.

(Let it be known, though, that Todoroki Shouto is completely and utterly dead.)

(And Tsuyu's words circle like buzzards staking out their prey, and part of him has to agree with her.)

* * *

 _And I love the way you hurt me, it's irresistible, yeah_

 _I love the way, I love the way, I love the way you hurt me, baby_

* * *

Shouto lays in his bed at night and he glances out the open window, tracing the constellations from Izuku's stardust onto the hazy glow of the sky. He's never considered himself a romantic, or a poetic, or a star-gazer, but Midoriya Izuku turns him into a lovestruck fool and he's never yearned more for anyone or anything in his life. Even his dreams of pro-heroism take a backburner to the boy made of starlight, and that unsettles him deeply.

He sits up, thoughts tumbling and turning as always, and stretches his limbs in front of him like a cat. When he blinks he sees the imprint of Izuku's face and a sigh escapes his throat. He shakes his head of those thoughts rather reluctantly, remembering the advice Tsuyu had given him.

(He can't take this-this _pining_ anymore. He wants to touch Izuku, wants to trace circles in Izuku's back and taste the constellations on his neck. He wants and he wants and _he wants_ so damn much. The only thing holding him back is himself.)

Feeling much lighter, Shouto falls back amongst the sheets and closes his eyes. His lips twitch into a smile and his heart slows down to a gentle murmur gradually. Soon, he is asleep.

(He is nervous but he is hopeful that he will be able to kiss those freckles and hold that cursed hand with pride in his chest.)

* * *

 _Try to say live, live and let live, but I'm no good, good at lip service_

 _Except when they're yours, mi amor,_ _ **I'm coming for you and I'm making war**_

* * *

"I like you," he says to Izuku after school in the courtyard, hidden away behind a tree. Izuku is glancing up at him from beneath its' loving embrace, back against the rough bark, and Shouto's heart is racing in his chest, so loud that he can't hear the distant mumbling of students leaving the property. Izuku goes red, from the tips of his ears to the bottom of his toes. His face is hot and red, hands flying to cover his cheeks from Shouto's piercing gaze.

"Uh….," Izuku replies, shaking lightly in disbelief. Shouto doesn't look away and Izuku can't _think_ at all. "I love you too!" he shouts, eyes closing automatically. Shouto blinks, and there's a beat of silence before he too, is crimson all over. Steam erupts from the taller boy's face and he nearly kisses the ground from shock.

" _Clearly_ I've _died_ and went to heaven," he murmurs without thinking. Izuku collapses, using the tree as a lifeline. His other hand slaps his open mouth and his toes curl in his shoes. Shouto looks at him and melts into a puddle on the floor, staggering forward until his face is nuzzling Izuku's warm neck. Izuku squeaks and turns his face into Shouto's hair, inhaling his scent. His eyelids stutter and close as the unmistakable scent that is Shouto enters his nostrils.

"I, uh, I guess we-we both liked each o-other then?" Izuku blurts out nervously, trying and failing to stand. Shouto's arms wrap around his waist, steadying him.

"Mmmnn I guess so," Shouto answers, deceptively calmer. He pulls away from Izuku's neck and squints down at the boy. "Can I kiss you?"

(Izuku dies on the spot.)

He squeaks but nods, lips trembling and heart working in overdrive. His stomach clenches as Shouto leans down, eyes sliding close as Shouto grows closer. His heart's in his throat but he's been waiting for this for a while now so _screw_ it.

It's warm and cold and oh so _sweet_. Izuku turns his head slightly so his nose doesn't bump Shouto's and his fingers reach up to tug at Shouto's hair. Shouto groans in delight at the fingers tangling in his locks, pulling Izuku closer to his flushed body. His own fingers inch down and under Izuku's shirt, spreading across his back. Izuku exhales sharply as he kneads the firm muscle and his whole body trembles at the pleasant feeling.

They pull away shortly after, lungs screaming for air. Neither of them can look at the other, and hide their flushed faces in each other's uniforms. Shouto laughs breathily as he nuzzles the side of Izuku's head.

"Ah your hair really is softer than it looks, Midoriya," he says. Izuku snorts and presses his face against Shouto's hair.

"Izuku," he murmurs, to Shouto's confusion. "You can call me Izuku." Shouto sucks in a breath and makes way towards one of Izuku's ears. His breath is warm on the tips, further darkening the red still lingering.

"Then _you_ can call me Shouto, I-zu-ku," he whispers teasingly into Izuku's ear, mouth hovering close it enough to touch. Izuku shivers violently at the action, chest warming up at his name on Shouto's lips. He pulls away from his pretty boy and juts his lip out in a pout, cheeks darkening in a blush.

"Aw, don't tease me _Shouto_ ," Izuku says, moss green eyes wide. Shouto's cheeks erupt and he's _far_ too warm and hell, that wasn't even remotely _fair_.

(His arm catches fire for the second time that week, caused by one Midoriya Izuku again.)

(Todoroki Shouto also dies for the second time that week, but at least this time it wasn't out of embarrassment.)

* * *

I highly recommend re-reading this while listening to Irresistible ! It was the inspiration for this fic...FOB songs honestly remind me of Tododeku TBH. Enjoy !


End file.
